


Twelve.

by PiggyNagi



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, idk if this is considered as
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2019-01-06 18:50:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12216807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PiggyNagi/pseuds/PiggyNagi
Summary: This breeze that caresses me, I wonder if it's from you. Are you afraid that I might fade from your crying eyes.





	Twelve.

**Author's Note:**

> Plot is pretty much based on Super Junior KRY's Stop Walking By. Give it a listen here~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igfVsAXCA1k
> 
> Sorry for the grammar mistakes. :)

The ground is shaking.

It’s crumbling underneath my feet.

There’s also tiny droplets of autumn rain rolling down my face.

I find myself stopping on my tracks on the street in a chilly autumn sunset, seeing leaves falling and dancing with the wind. As I breath in and kneel on the ground, I cover my eyes with my hands, letting myself imagine that it is your hand who is covering my eyes playfully, providing warmth on this cold night as you hug me from behind. 

I realized that it’s not the ground that shakes underneath my feet.

I realized that it is not raining. 

It’s my tears that is rolling down my cheeks.

It’s my heart that is crumbling and falling into pieces.

 

_“Guess who?”_

_Minhyun chuckled. “Babe, just the feel of your hands on my face, I know it’s going to be you.” He then turns around, happy to see his lover’s smiling face. His lover looks so beautiful under the light from the autumn sunset, with the leaves falling and dancing with the wind around them. He reached for his hand, kissing his knuckles, and saw his lover blush at his actions. The said lover retracted his hand from Minhyun’s grasp, cradled his face and pecked his lips._

_“I love you. Hwang Minhyun. Only you.”_

_Minhyun smiled, pearly white teeth showing on display. He held his lover’s neck, and kissed him, pouring out all his love through the kiss._

_“I love you too, Ong Seongwoo. No one else but you.”_

 

Dragging my feet to the kitchen, I grabbed a clean glass on the counter top and went to the fridge to poured water in it. I looked around, seeing that the kitchen is void of another presence, I can’t help but exit the kitchen hastily.

I wiped the tear that unconsciously rolled down on my face.

Is it wrong to hope that I could also wipe down the memory of you that’s playing in my head?

  


But then, is it also wrong for me to wish that you were here with me, rekindling the happy memories that we had together?

 

_“Seongwoo-yah.”_

_Seongwoo looked up from what he’s doing, his nose cutely covered with flour. “I’m making pancakes for breakfast, Minhyun! Go away! You’ll ruin my masterpiece.”_

_“A masterpiece with all this mess?” Minhyun laughed, looking around and saw bits of spilled flour and cracked egg shells on the countertop. He also saw a bunch of other ingredients scattered on their dining table. Minhyun opted to not describe the mess. He sees Seongwoo still stirring the pancake batter on the bowl._

_“Hey, every masterpiece comes from mess.” Seongwoo said, now grabbing a nonstick pan and heated it on the stove. “Help me clean up this mess at least, instead of standing there admiring me.” He then poured some of the batter onto the pan and put a lid on it, waiting for the bubbles to form on top of the pancakes._

_Minhyun giggled and proceeds to clean the countertop first. “Yes, master.”_

_Seongwoo looked at Minhyun, scandalized. “I thought I told you that is a forbidden word when we’re outside the bedroom?”_

_“Well, I’m your master when we’re in the bedroom so your argument is basically invalid.” Minhyun teased. He was met with white dust dancing around his face, apparently Seongwoo threw a handful of flour on his face. Minhyun giggled and tried to catch Seongwoo’s arms, but the latter keeps on flailing around while throwing more flour to his direction. More wrestling later, Minhyun finally got a hold of Seongwoo’s wrist, yanked and trapped him in between his body and the countertop. His hands that was once on the countertop moved to hold Seongwoo’s waist, effectively stopping his lover from throwing more flour in the kitchen. Seongwoo, who was still giggling, instinctively placed his arms on Minhyun’s shoulders, bringing him closer until their lips connected into a deep kiss._

_Parting due to lack of air, Minhyun said, “Babe, I smell something burning.”_

_Five seconds later. ”My pancakes!” Seongwoo pushed Minhyun and literally skipped in front of the stove. Minhyun was laughing as he sees Seongwoo trying to save their pancakes. Seongwoo glared at ‘his’ perpetrator. “This is all your fault!”_

_Minhyun walked and hugged Seongwoo from behind. Kissing the pout coming from Seongwoo’s lips, he said “I’ll make it up to you?”_

_Seongwoo can’t help but form a grin, his dimple in full display._

_“You better be.”_

 

I sat on my couch, sipping the liquid on my cup as I watched Song Ilguk and his children eat in a restaurant on TV. I find it cute how affectionate the actor is with his kids, letting the viewers know that his triplets are his world. 

Two years ago, I also pictured myself as an affectionate father to my children and a reliable partner to my husband.

I still am picturing myself as an affectionate father to my future children.

How perfect will it be if we’re raising the children together, showing our adopted children that love knows no boundaries? 

_“Minhyun-ah.” Seongwoo called as they cuddle at the couch on a sunny afternoon, watching Haru and Tablo play on their living room and singing Fantastic Baby on TV. Minhyun squeezed Seongwoo’s hand, signaling that he’s listening to whatever he wants to say._

_Minhyun hears the hesitation on Seongwoo’s voice. “Do you…. Do you want to build a family with me?”_

_He looks at his partner, shocked and ecstatic to know that he’s not the only one dreaming about it. “Of course, I do Seongwoo-yah.” Grinning, he moved to kiss Seongwoo, lifting his shirt slightly and feeling the soft skin on his hips. Seongwoo reciprocated the kiss, swiping his tongue at the roof of Minhyun’s palate and hears the latter’s moan in satisfaction. Minhyun moved his lips on Seongwoo’s neck to leave love bites on it, not caring whether Seongwoo’s coworkers would see it or not, and simultaneously caressing Seongwoo’s nipples with his fingers. Moaning, but partly confused with the sudden affection Minhyun has been showing him, Seongwoo hesitantly moved Minhyun away from him. “What are you doing, babe?”_

_“Umm..” Not caring about the abrupt resistance to his ministrations, Minhyun moved to kiss Seongwoo on his neck again before whispering to his ear. “Trying to make babies with you?”_

_Seongwoo slapped Minhyun’s chest. “You pervert!” He giggles at the ticklish feeling as Minhyun still kissing his neck, rolling his eyes and ignoring Minhyun’s retort of ‘you love it anyway’. “Since when did men conceive?”_

_“Maybe in the future? Maybe they’re developing something for couples like us.” Minhyun says, hope in his tone as retracts himself from Seongwoo’s neck, hands still holding the latter’s hips. “What are your plans anyway? Do you want to adopt an infant or a 5-year old? Do you want it to be a boy or a girl? How many do you want to adopt?”_

_“It actually doesn’t matter.” Seongwoo says as he pecks Minhyun’s nose. “As long as you’re here with me raising them, both of us showing them that there are no boundaries when it comes to love.”_

_“What matters to me is that you’re happy, we’re both happy, and our future children are happy.” Minhyun kissed Seongwoo’s forehead, stamping a silent promise on it, and whispered. “Can we go back to our baby making?”_

_Seongwoo slaps Minhyun’s chest again in the midst of his giggling. “Who are you and what did you do to my composed partner?”_

_Instead of answering, Minhyun kissed him passionately as Seongwoo latched himself to the former and let himself be carried to their bedroom, Return of the Superman still airing on the TV._

_Baby making first, let’s do the adoption papers later._

I laughed at the memory, laughed so hard that tears already formed on my eyes.

I wish that the tears I just shed were tears from happiness.

 

The ground is shaking.

It’s crumbling underneath my feet.

There’s also tears rolling down my face, and drops on the patch of soil underneath my hands.

I let my fingertips stroke the ground, touching the words imprinted on it, like a blind person learning braille for the first time. Feeling the sudden shift of chilly air, I can’t help but continue crying, knowing that this is your way of comforting me.

"I miss you." I cannot control my sobs anymore. "I miss you so much." 

_Twelve months._

_Twelve months ago, Seongwoo suggested to do a road trip as their couple get-away, so they went for a road trip from Seoul to Busan. Seongwoo loves to drive, and he wants to visit Minhyun’s hometown. So even though it is not ideal to do road trips as trains are invented for a reason, they still pushed it. At least they got to visit beautiful cities such as Daejeon and Gyeongju and got to eat their delicacies too._

_Eleven months ago, Seongwoo suggested that they go to an amusement park, fully aware that his lover was not fond of rollercoasters and pirate ship rides. Flashing his toothy grin and excessive aegyo, Seongwoo managed to convince Minhyun to go and seeing a shaking and puking Minhyun each ride was very amusing to watch._

_Ten months ago, Seongwoo suggested that they go out of the country and do snorkeling. “But Seongwoo, we have Jeju Island for a reason.” Minhyun argued, not liking the idea that much. “But I’ve never travelled out of the country.” Seongwoo pouted. Maybe it’s the pout on his lover’s lips that made Minhyun to check out the flights going to Palawan, Philippines._

_Nine months ago, Seongwoo suggested that they go to a nearby arcade. Minhyun happily obliged, dressing up quickly and they were out of their apartment’s door in an hour. They’re both competitive, so they bet that whoever loses will be the receiving end in one of their ‘nightly activities’. Seongwoo loses, not that he minded actually._

_Eight months ago, Seongwoo wants to see Minhyun while working, so he did. As the CEO of the company, Seongwoo knows Minhyun is too busy to eat out and only eats instant ramen as his lunch. Because of this, he cooked packed lunch for the both of them (with love, of course) and made a surprise visit to Minhyun’s office. “I hope we still have an apartment to go home to.” Minhyun teased, eating the lunch Seongwoo made for the both of them. The latter glared, but smiled nevertheless. “We still, do. Thank you very much.” He said, chewing the food that he had worked hard for to cook. He then notices Minhyun staring at him with a glint on his eyes, so he looked at him with a silent question in his eyes. “You know, I have this dream every night…” Minhyun smirked and winked. Seongwoo chose the wrong moment to look down, seeing the evident bulge on his lover’s pants. He threw a grain of rice to Minhyun. “You and your kinks!” He saw Minhyun giggle and come over to his side. “Come on, all you have to do is to be quiet. I’ll do all the work.” And so, he obliged to Minhyun’s fantasies, packed lunch long forgotten._

_Seven months ago, Seongwoo dragged Minhyun to the theaters to watch a horror movie. He knew Minhyun is usually not scared of horror movies, but he heard that this movie will scare the shit out of them, that even the horror movie enthusiasts can’t sleep at night. And he wants to see Minhyun be scared for the first time, so he wishes himself a good luck. But his luck and his courage betrayed him, because not even on the half way of the movie, he’s already screaming out of fear and burying his head on Minhyun’s neck. At the end of the movie, he can feel himself shaking at Minhyun’s arms. He hears the latter chuckle. “Why did you choose this movie in the first place? Come on, let’s go get ice cream.” Seongwoo let himself be dragged by Minhyun to the nearest ice cream parlor._

_Six months ago, Seongwoo said he wants to star-gaze at the rooftop of their apartment. So Minhyun bought the snacks and drinks that they both knew they won’t consume fully, and Seongwoo had set up their bed for the night. Seongwoo likes burrowing his head onto Minhyun’s chest because he could hear his heartbeat, as if its rhythm was the one playing on a marching band. “Did you know that the brightest star that you see in the sky is your loved one?” Seongwoo said, mindlessly tracing irregular shapes on Minhyun’s chest. The latter chuckles, “Well, the sky is missing out because its brightest star is right beside me.” Kissing the top of Seongwoo’s head, he continued. “You are my brightest star, Seongwoo-ah.”_

_Five months ago, Seongwoo went with Minhyun to their local gym, the latter saying that they didn’t go to the gym these days. Seongwoo argued by saying that ‘isn’t sex the best way to exercise?’ but Minhyun just rolled his eyes and said it doesn’t count. So, he reluctantly went to the treadmill while Minhyun uses the body building machine. Five minutes into the treadmill and he feels like he’s swimming in dizziness, deciding to stop in case it will get much worse. Seongwoo sat down on the bench and felt like he had never been this tired before._

_Four months, he can feel his body grow weaker every day._

_Three, he doesn’t have the heart to tell Minhyun that he had lost his appetite. So, he tried to swallow every food that Minhyun had served on their table, only to threw it out of his stomach once Minhyun left for work._

_Two, Minhyun had noticed his weight loss and his fatigue. Concerned, he was trying to convince Seongwoo to the hospital. Seongwoo screams, saying that all Minhyun does is nag, nag and nag. He slammed their bedroom door and cried, hoping that Minhyun will understand and won’t take his anger into his heart._

_One, Seongwoo knew he had twelve months to tell Minhyun._

_But he had only told him twelve hours before his terminal illness eats him alive._

_“Why didn’t you tell me?” Minhyun whispered sadly, looking down at Seongwoo’s face on his lap and fixing his hair on his forehead. Seongwoo wiped the tears that coming from Minhyun’s face, such a simple action caused him to be weary. He placed his arm back to its original position._

_“I’m sorry, Minhyun-ah.” Seongwoo said. “I was scared, I guess.”_

_Silence enveloped them, Minhyun still brushing Seongwoo’s hair off of his face. They stared at each other’s eyes, afraid that they won’t be able to cherish their last moments together._

_“Minhyun.” Seongwoo whispered. “I’m tired. Can I go to sleep?”_

_Unable to control his sobs, Minhyun nodded._

_“I love you.”_

_Seongwoo smiles._

_“I love you too.”_

_And Seongwoo closed his eyes._

**Author's Note:**

> I hope I didn't make anyone cry with this crappy fic.


End file.
